yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize