Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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