okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
