It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
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