For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
