I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
So much rum. So many feels.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
