we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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