i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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