I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
