We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
