I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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