all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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