somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize