I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
