i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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