stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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