but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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