When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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