Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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