I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
