But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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