mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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