I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
