i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
