listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
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