You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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