i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Randomize