she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
