they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
