i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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