you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
