I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize