Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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