she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
