Is it normal to miss your booty call?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize