I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
They have beer where we have blood.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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