whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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