So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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