i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
