honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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