quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
