We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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