Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
