doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
