He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
How external is "for external use only"?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
