What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
i came on her dog
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize