I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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