I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Randomize
