you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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