Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
