i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
