I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
