I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
